Eh.. feeling.. better? emotionally.. kind of...
I -still- have a headache from last night, that's not cool
and I'm sick
and yeah... feel pretty horrible

finished my psychology test in 10 minutes though. I was 10 minutes late... and I still finished before nearly everyone else xD

headache...

my heart.... doesn't know how to feel...

.. what have I done..?


.... and of COURSE Wish You Well has to start RIGHT NOW... indescribably perfect v.v
.. I can't even cry...


:edit:
apologies. this is just me having an emotional breakdown, nothing to worry about. just.. needed... outlet....

Forget And Not Slow Down
How many times can I push it aside?
Is it time I befriended all the ghosts of all the things that haunt me the most?
So they leave me alone, move on with my life,
Be certain the steps of left and right don't fight the direction of upright

I'd rather forget and not slow down
Than gather regret for the things I can't change now
If I become what I can't accept
Resurrect the saint from within the wretch
Pour over me and wash my hands of it

It's time to decide, which is out of my mind
Cause it'll be me unless I put some thoughts to rest
And leave some faults behind
I'll watch the glint in my eye shine off the spring in my step
And it could be blinding depending on the amount of You that I reflect

Cause I could spend my life just trying to sift through
What I could've done better, but what good do what-if's do?
Oh oh, oh oh, there's something I should tell you now

I'd rather forget and not slow down
Than gather regret for the things I can't change now
If I become what I can't accept
Resurrect the saint from within the wretch
Pour over me and wash my hands of it



I Don't Need A Soul
I listen to the sirens as they sing me back to sleep
I pray that no one's seriously hurt
It feels like everything is dying at the pivot point of me
I listen to the sirens tell me things could still be worse

Cause if you close your eyes and listen close
You can hear the chapter close
And it's all rebound in better clothes
And you like the way this story goes
Cause the sun still burns the shadows out
And there's nothing to complain about now

Cause if this was our destiny I'd treasure the fact
And I'd give you what's left of me if I'd held back

But I don't need a soul
No, I don't need a soul to hold
Without you I'm still whole
You and life remain beautiful
You and life remain beautiful

Departing from the hospital
Ill news shows on your face too well
You're trying not to cough at all, it hurts
All options are exhausted, all your numbered days are numbered small
I miss you now, I loved you
And I know things could still be worse



Candlelight
To know her is to love her
I'm goin' undercover
To catch a glimpse but not get caught
But to see her, could be worse,
If I don't get my head on straight first
On second thought, I guess I'll not

She's almost brighter than the sun
Seems to be to be unfair
When you consider everyone
Who pales when they compare
When they compare

Can't hold a candle to her
Cause all the moths get in the way
And they'll begin to chew her entire attire until it frays
She outshines anyone, whoever might
Dare to bask in the same candlelight

Oh please, don't seat us in the back
With all the insects and the trash
She is a lady, I'm the tramp
Collecting stares in pairs close by
Then flutters in a butterfly
You, just a moth drawn to the lamp

She's like an ancient artifact
Something you're lucky to have found
She'll pinch the nerves in all the necks
When she turns those heads around
Those heads around



Flare
A solar flare
Shines through her hair
It's so unfair
When you compare
The one who's fairest of the fair



Part Of It
I've been working with adhesives
Chains and locks and ropes with knots to tether
But nothing's sticking to the pieces
I can't seem to hold it all together

But you should know
Cause that explains why it all just fell apart

It's not the end of the world
Just you and me
We're a part of it, everyone
We're a part of it, everything
And if a nightmare ever does unfold
Perspective is a lovely hand to hold

Well, I've been trying to ingest this
But everything to me just seems like nonsense
And I'm not sure if I can get it
I guess it's time for me to grow a conscience
To combat the laps
That explains why all of this simply collapsed

It's been forever since I've gone
But I'm the culdesac(??) on the lawn of your heart
It may be forever 'til I go
But before then you should know
That I could tear this place apart
I could tear this place apart

I swear this to you
I wish that this was not the truth
But it's something that you fell into
Crawling out is hard for you
I'm not so sure it's what you wanna do
Not convinced it's what you wanna do

It's just the weight of the world
Giving out under the string
And we're a part of it, everyone
We're a part of it, everything
And when a nightmare finally does unfold
When a nightmare finally shows

It's not the end of the world
Just a calamity
And we're a part of it, everyone
We're a part of it, everything
And when a nightmare finally does unfold
Perspective is a lovely hand to hold


Outro
I swear this to you
I wish that this was not the truth
But it's something that you fell into
Crawling out is hard on you
I'm not so sure it's what you wanna do

I swear this to you (When the nightmare finally does unfold)
I wish that this was not the truth (Perspective is a lovely hand to hold)
But it's something that you fell into (Perspective is a lovely hand to hold)
This choice is hard to make on you
I'm not convinced it's what you wanna do

When the nightmare finally does unfold
Perspective is a lovely hand to hold



Therapy
I never thought I'd be driving through the country just to drive
With only music and the clothes that I woke up in

I never thought I'd need all this time alone
It goes to show I had so much yet I had need for nothing but you, but you

This is just therapy, just call it what it is
With a death grip on this life always transitioning
This is just therapy, cause you won't take my calls
And that makes God the only one who's left here listening to me

Letting it all sink in, it's good to feel a sting now and again
I hope it's one less woeful thing there is to fight through

Forgetting it all, begin, fresh paper and a nice expensive pen
The past cannot subtract a thing from what I might do for you
Unless that's what I let it do

This is just therapy, just call it what it is
With a death grip on this life always transitioning
This is just therapy, cause you won't take my calls
And that makes God the only one who's left here listening

Loneliness and solitude are two things not to get confused
Cause I spend my solitude with you

Gather all the questions of the things I just can't get straight
And I answer them the way I guess you do

Cause this is my therapy
Cause you're the only one who's listening to me



Over It
I'll admit to who I am
The day I come to understand
I haven't got a clue
Been searching for a few years now

If I don't repeat myself
Then I'll change into someone else
Well, I don't quite know who
Been searching for a few years now

I'm over it, you're behind me now, I'm just over it
I'm over it, yeah, I'm finding out, I'm just over it
No, I don't know it's over just yet
But I won't go slow, and time can let the mind forget
Don't tell me you don't know already

I'll protect your universe
And make a mess to make it worse
But time will only tell
You and no one else, so

I'm over it, you're behind me now, I'm just over it
I'm over it, yeah, I'm finding out, I'm just over it
No, I don't know it's over just yet
But I won't go slow, and time can let the mind forget
Don't tell me you don't know already
Don't tell me you let go, oh

You say you made up your mind
And you finally decided
that those that helped you choose
Haven't the slightest clue as to
The magnitude of what you're about to lose

I'm guarded and therefore I can endure
A little bit more, just a little bit more
Then some people would, if we're not misunderstood
It's still an attempt to be egoist while self assured (?)
If I'm still unsure that I'm pretty sure
That I am pretty good, God, You know I'm good, and

I'm over it, you're behind me now, I'm just over it
I'm over it, yeah, I'm finding out, I'm just over it
No, I don't know it's over just yet
But I won't go slow, and time can let the mind forget
Don't tell me you don't know already
Don't tell me you let go, already



Sahara
Lying on my side, knowing of thirst is how I'll die, chalk on my tongue
Lying on the night beneath the dunes is where I lie to block the sun

Trying to ignite some sort of passion from inside to overcome
This feeling of desertion can't be worse than never having anyone

So I'll ask one thing, just one thing of you
Don't ever turn me loose, even when I turn my back

A lion on his side, was it the lying or his pride which brought him down?
Once the king of beasts, but now they feast on the thoughts beneath his vacant crown

Trying to decide, was it the lying or the pride which brought it down?
To be alone, to be dethroned, believe me I know all about it now

So I'll ask one thing, just one thing of you
Don't ever turn me loose, even when I turn my back

I never told you then that I'd be easy to love
Supposedly I'm a man but I felt like a cub
I wandered into the plains, further and farther away
Not ever knowing that I'd never come back the same

As long as gave what I swear I felt like the first (...?)
It's been thirteen days and I'm dying of thirst
As for the birds of prey, I pray that someone else will get here first
I'm not alone, I'll be alright, just take these bones and bring them back to life

So I'll ask one thing, just one thing of you
Don't ever turn me loose
So I'll ask one thing, just one thing of you
Don't ever turn me loose (so I'll ask)
Don't ever turn me loose (one thing)
Don't ever turn me loose (just one thing)
Even when I turn my back



Oasis
Savannah, Savannah, Savannah... mmmm...



Savannah
Savannah, I hope to be there by the morning
And see this pining all transforming to the arms of the Georgia sun

Savannah, I'd love to feel the heat of sunrise
Brushing rays across my windshield as if one dries the streams from off my face

Yet I know you'll be there
Cause you'll know I'll want you to be there
And we'll say hello
Cause you're smiling in love and we'll sigh so relieved
I believe, because we will both know by tonight
We'll feel normal again, but until then...

Savannah, our backs supported by a hammock
We sum up perfection like a handbook
And God knows it all too well

Savannah, we'll take a walk to find a gift shop
Who would have thought the book that you bought
Would never come off the shelf

Yet I know you'll be there
Cause you'll know I'll want you to be there
And we'll say hello
As I'm smiling in love and we'll sigh so relieved
I believe, because we will both know by tonight
We'll feel normal again, mm, but until then...
Until then, mm, until then...

Baby, I spent my life wondering, wondering when I'd find you
I searched for all these years, and now you're right here
And I need you to know that everything makes sense when you're with me

Savannah, walk out into the sultry evening
Cotton breathing when the sea winds brush the hair down around your neck

Savannah, you hold my hand like it's the first time
And all the feelings that our hearts find will be just what we expect

Yet I know you'll be there
Cause you'll know I'll want you to be there
And we'll say hello
Cause you're smiling in love and we'll sigh so relieved
I believe, because we will both know by tonight
We'll feel normal again, but until then...
Until then, until then...



Baby
Baby, it's all that I can do to thank you
Cause every time you wrapped those arms around me
I felt I was home cause
Everything made sense when you were with me



If You Believe Me
I got a chill and I wanted to say it was you
Be still because what I'm about to say is the truth
Unless we stretch until the point of nearly breaking in two
We'll never find our weakness coming unglued

A cracked sculpture, I wanted to say it was you
Feeding vultures (??) are why I feel the way I do
Fell in love and I wanted to say it was you
I wanted to say it was you

If you believe me
We could stand the test of time like no one else
If you believe me
It means you'd have to disbelieve yourself

A sudden wind and I wanted to say it was you
I've never been so confused about who knows the truth
It began when I wanted to say it was you
Cause I swore you had your hand in this too

If you believe me
We could stand the test of time like no one else
If you believe me
You know it means you'd have to disbelieve yourself
If you believe me...

Because I'm here wondering what could you be thinking
Though I know you're there thinking that I wonder that all the time
I can still invade your thoughts when you're not with me
Yeah, don't mind me, I'm just a parasite on your mind
Yeah, don't mind me I know you're wondering all the time

If you believe me
We could stand the test of time like no one else
If you believe me
It means you'd have to disbelieve yourself
If you believe me



This Is The End
I can't keep a straight face and say this is not the end
Not if you want it, it's upon us and I wanna say it's sinking in

This may sound crazy but I wanna come back home
That's it, I said it, now I'm sailing off to Never Land, and then Japan

So think real slow
Don't forget that yes is yes and no is no
About the way you wanna go
Cause you may forget the way to get back home
This is the end if you want it, this is the end

You're not the first thing in my life I've loved and lost
Yeah, I've thought worse things that I might be less inclined to really just shrug off
I took the fire escape and made it out alive
Yeah, I still burn from time to time but I've a healing hand against my side

So think real slow
Don't forget that yes is yes and no is no
About the way you wanna go
Cause you may forget the way to get back home
This is the end if you want it, this is the end if you want it, this is the end


(If You Want It)
I can't keep a straight face and say this is not the end
Not if you want it, it's upon us and I wanna say it's sinking in
If I was hasty, maybe I was rushed along
I will move into little boxes and then not give the urge to move on (?)

So think real slow, don't forget that yes is yes and no is no
Melting prince of grass and snow, means I may forget the way to get back home
Cause this is the end if you want it, this is the end

You're not the first thing in my life I've loved and lost
Yeah, I've thought worse things that I might be less inclined to really just shrug off
You'll take me home, like my family did, my father did, I know
You'll think real slow, don't forget the speed that I can go (away)

Cause this is the end if you want it, this is the end

I've been convincing myself that I'm worthwhile
Cause I'm worth what I'll convince myself to be
Been convincing myself that I'm worthwhile
Cause I'm worth what I'll convince myself to be

I met the devil and I stared her in the eyes
Her hair had scales like silver serpents high as statues, stood there mesmerized
I took the fire escape and made it out alive
Yeah, I still burn from time to time, but I've a healing hand against my side

Blisters on my feet I crawl back home
Frozen from the sleet, burns, sand and stone
Nourished back to life by life alone
One shake of the mane may gain the throne



Terminals
They said the timing was dreadful (yeah, you can say that again)
Now there is one pair of heads full (of thoughts that don't make any sense)
Just passing through, trying to catch that glimpse of you

I never hold on when I change
Terminals at ATL
It's a balance of grace
In a place where I tripped and fell
But if grace receives all my weight
Then it becomes a crutch
And I don't wanna walk a crutch so much
That I can't stand taller than before

It splintered, and I felt horrendous (lying through the gap in my teeth)
The broken is when You can mend us (so help me get back up on my feet)
Just passing through, trying to catch that glimpse of you

I never hold on when I change
Terminals at ATL
It's a balance of grace
In a place where I tripped and fell
But if grace receives all my weight
Then it becomes a crutch
And I don't wanna walk with a crutch so much
That I can't stand taller than before

I, I'm staring ??
I can't believe you're standing next to me

I will stand taller than before

I'm strangely addicted to Owl City now.
I was introduced to him a couple years ago, and listened to the songs that were up on purevolume every so often, but now there's this new epic explosion with Fireflies.
I hate just following current fads, but I can't help it. Like with the Beatles. I was there slightly before the initial tidal wave, but it just keeps me going.
I'm also curious about the Matthew Thiessen connection xD

I think I found some books for my dragon research paper!
I got 100% on both my psychology and US history tests!
I have an algebra test on Monday...

I has henna! But it was barely on for an hour, so it won't last more than a couple days =/

I still haven't specifically heard from certain people... v.v

I feel so useless...

Going to sleep now... I swear...